A horrible mommy! That's what I am!!! There's no other excuse for me...plain and simple...I'm just not cut out for this thing called parenthood!
That's how I feel a lot of the time when I'm here with the kids by myself. Like today, Mark is working, so I've been #1 parent all day long.
My mind goes numb from all of the yelling and hollering and running and screaming.......then there's all the stuff that the kids do!!!!
I read something earlier while I was giving Mackie a Bath that it's "o.k. to be aggravated". It's perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed as a parent. I thought to myself "well whoop-ti-do Mrs. Writer-Person! Now, what do you think I should do about the overwhelm-ed-ness?" Nothing.....just that it's o.k. There was no 12 step plan to get past the feelings of "Oh Dear Lord in Heaven, please remind me why I'm here?".
Life as I see it is a series of events, some unfortunate and some very wonderful! It is all in how we deal with those events that define us as people to ourselves and to others. I'm afraid that I often am seen as a CRAZY NUT who can't ever open my mouth when I ought to. Sometimes, although very rarely, I do rise above my nut-case ways, and do or say the right things. I really hope above hope that I will be able to adjust my mental condition so that I can get my children raised to remember that "Mommy was always so nice and sweet and loved us and baked cookies and NEVER hollered."
I've got a long way to go..........please pray for my nerves, my ears, my husband's mind, and my children's behinds......oh.....and please pray that Mackie will learn to talk so that the constant "uuuugggghhhhh!!!!!!!! EEekkkkkkeeeeekkkkk!!!!!" will stop........Oh.....and also pray that Creston will stop touching/tackling/attacking/arresting/and pushing his brother......OH!!!!.....and please pray that I will learn the fine art of getting Creston into bed at a decent hour on the nights that Mark is working.......he seems to think that he CAN'T POSSIBLY go to bed until mommy goes to bed...........ect., ect...........:o)
2023 Christmas Letter
4 months ago
Posts
Oh Martha! I can relate. Motherhood gets very overwhelming at times and I can ONLY imagine the challenges of TWO young children at once!
ReplyDeleteI want to something a lady with 8 children told me after we had just gotten home from Vietnam and I was feeling the same way because if you remember I was not feeling well at all, so weak and tired I could hardly function and was hoping and praying I would be better when John went back to work. Anyway, here is what she said:
"A couple things come to mind about parenting. I want you to repeat over and over to yourself GOD CHOSE ME TO BE NICHOLAS' MOTHER. God knows all your faults and weaknesses. He also knows all your strengths. There is not another mother on the face of the Earth who would be a better mother for Nicholas. God knows that.
That doesn't mean there won't be times you feel like a failure as a mother. We all do. But we can learn from those times and become better mothers. There will be times where Nicholas is crying and you just cannot help him feel better. There will be times you feel so frustrated you will understand child abuse in a way you never could before you had kids--the difference is you will be able to put him down and walk away until you cool down. This is not something most parents talk about, but it's true. We all feel frustrated and incapable at times. But remember GOD CHOSE YOU ANNE! Even days where you feel you can't do it GOD KNOWS YOU CAN."
So I figured a mother with 8 children has credibility to know what she is talking about. This was really encouraging to me and I hope it is to you too.